I have a confession. (It’s probably not super groundbreaking or surprising for most of you considering my track record on this blog…) But, I played Dungeons and Dragons. Last night was my first time playing a campaign and I fell in love. Hardcore. How have I not done this before? Everything that I love about RPGs have in some way been based off of D&D. And now, I’ve been indoctrinated.
The name of our campaign is Savage Tide. Once we got over the fact that our campaign was called ‘Savage Tide’ (cue menstruation jokes from all of us), we started our night off creating our characters. Dumpling and I had decided to be uber geeks and craft our backstories before making it to our first actual meeting. This made filling out the character sheet a little easier. For all you folks out there who have never played D&D (or any video game that has required you to customize and assign abilities), it’s kind of a long process. It took the five of us playing about two hours to get ready.
Our adventure started out in the city of Sasserine. Each of us received a visit from a woman named Cora with an invitation to visit Lady Lavinia Vanderboren. Being the Casanova that I am, I liked to assume that this ‘request’ for something suited to my skillz, was really lady Lavinia looking for a good time. Unfortunately, my other future party members were invited to her estate as well. And thus began our journey.
My Top Three Highlights from the Evening
- I stopped by the Rusty Mermaid to ask the bartender about this weird letter I received and to find out more about the Vanderborens. While he informed me of their backstory, I was offered free beer by a bard who thought I was totes hot. Freya (one of the five of us) also decided to go into the Rusty Mermaid and thus began the most awkward D&D conversation of all time:
Me: I would like to offer my beer to the Half-Elf that just walked in…I’m not sure if that Bard put something in it and would like to test it out on her.
Freya: I cast a spell to check for magic/suspicious things in the beer.
Dungeon Master: Is that your normal response when a women offers you beer in a bar? To cast a spell?
Dungeon Master: The room illuminates in blue light, you cast a spell and nothing happens. The beer appears normal.
We then had the most mundane conversation about asking each other’s names and how I was awkward. I’m not sure how everyone else sat through that conversation.
- Killing stuff! I really enjoyed fighting in this game which is strange considering that isn’t usually a highlight for me. Dumpling and I still found a way to work as a team the entire time. We don’t do anything separately. Ever. She would charge and punch the crap out of people and I would follow closely behind striking from the shadows. We were awesome and evaded every attack against us.
- My friend L-Dawg’s D&D name is a word not suited for this blog. I will only hint at the fact that it’s in reference to a lady’s private parts and being…kind of a douche bag. However, we all laughed so hard and made SO many jokes about it the entire night…and the fact that our Dungeon Master had to say it whenever he referred to her.
Overall, it was the most amazing night ever filled with danger and intrigue. Do I regret not getting any sleep? Absolutely not. If playing D&D were a full time job, I would do it. For free. And I’d work overtime.
Get ready, you guys. I’m going to be regularly updating you on my Dungeons and Dragons adventures as we play. Our DM told us this campaign could technically last YEARS. Yeah, you heard me. I’m so excited I could pee my pants.
Have you ever played Dungeons and Dragons?